Siblings Without Rivalry

Leafed through the book last night.  Here are some pointers that can be put into practice.

• Instead of dismissing negative feelings about a sibling, acknowledge the feelings;
• Give Children in fantasy what they don't have in reality, express what the child might wish;
• Help children channel their hostile feelings into symbolic or creative outlets;
• Use words not behavior to express feelings;
• Make grievances list, allow bad feelings leads to good feelings;
• Avoid unfavorable/favorable comparisons among children;
• Be specific on praises;
• Instead of worrying about giving equal amount, focus on each child's individual needs;
• Instead of claiming equal love, show children how they're loved uniquely;
• Give time in terms of need;
• Children don't need to be treated equally, they need to be treated uniquely
• Let no child locked into a role either by others (parents/siblings), or him/herself.
• Children with problems don't need to be viewed as problem children
• Acceptance of their frustration
• Appreciation for what they have accomplished however imperfect
• Help in focusing solution
• Leave the final decison up to the children while resolving a conflict.